Tag Archives: pregnancy

3 More days and 4 more shots….

I’ve actually been too tired to nest these past few days…which is probably a relief for Jeremy and Morgan 🙂

My husband is incredible! He’s gotten up with the Mo-man 2 days in a row so that I can sleep in (until 10am!) and he’s been home to give me my Heparin shots which hurt SO much less when he does them for some reason. I think it has to do with the fact that I am still so chicken to hub the needle and do it so slowly that the pain is just drawn out, where he just gives it an expert jab and it’s over.

Both of my hips are black and blue–we’ve run out of excess skin in the belly area and have to put them in my hips and thighs. Guess excess skin will not be an issue when I do my 6 weeks of Lovenox after the birth….I’m imagining my tummy will look like chewed bubble gum 🙂

We installed the car seat today–which still seems presumptuous to me after losing our first baby. I am trying to go with it and have faith that everything will be ok. I just know from my online support group that bad things happen, even at the end and I am staying a bit guarded.  I do appreciate all of my friends who have patiently listened to my fears without judgement and not tried to get Mary Sunshine on me.   We’ve made it this far and things are looking good for us. We just need to hold on to that and BELIEVE that the best is in store for us.

J’s grandfather made his Sunday call today to wish us well. He’s an absolute doll and I love it when I get a chance to hear his happy voice on the phone. I think he’s 97 years old and could not be more adorable if he tried.  He’s looking forward to the arrival of his third great grandchild and I can’t wait for them to meet.  I treasure a picture of Morgan and his cousin Sullivan sitting on Great Grandpa’s knee during one of our summer trips to upstate NY. Cute as can be!

We swam in the pool today and enjoyed lunch out as a family. I’m feeling like an enormous whale woman with the belly right now. I put on a two piece today and cracked up. Some people totally rock it–hopefully my neighbors weren’t scarred for life if they happened to see over the fence 🙂

I plan to try to clean up a bit tomorrow in anticipation of family arriving on Tuesday. J did the grocery shopping today so we will have some options in the coming week.  I cannot believe it’s happening NOW.

****Oh! On a completely unrelated note, I wanted to share a super easy adaptation for Strawberry Shortcake that I came up with last week.

I made the shortcake using Bisquick heart healthy baking mix’s recipe for Bicuits–substituting half and half for the milk called for to make it very rich (and less heart healthy) and added a teaspoon of vanilla extract.  You can do either a drop biscuit style short cake or roll the dough into a circle and score into 6 triangles for a shortcake that looks more like a scone.  I sprinkled a packet of turbinado “Sugar in the Raw” on top of the dough for sweetness.

The berries consisted of a pint of strawberries slightly smooshed with a potato masher, lemon zest (about 2 tsp) and a Tablespoon of Grand Marnier. I added 2 tsp sugar but you can adjust that to taste depending on the sweetness of your berries. This was left on the counter during the baking of the shortcake and dinner to let the juices develop and the flavors to blend.

To prepare: simply slice the shortcake in half and mound with fresh berries. Add whipped cream and garnish with additional berries. Serves 4-6 depending on how generous you are.


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My Saturday–things that I want to remember

Right now I cannot find the camera….which doesn’t bode well for next week 🙂 But we’re having a wonderful day as a family and I wanted to write something GOOD to remember that even though pregnancy was stressful and crazy for me that there were great days where I was just happy to be a mom and a wife and to feel so much love in our home.

Today we worked on Morgan’s room–putting in a new book shelf and arranging furniture so that it looked lived in with the crib gone. I tackled my fear of crafting over the past week and made a collage portrait of a big frog that matches the one on his bedding. Morgan loves it! He keeps telling me “Thank you Mommy for making my frog!” We hung it low over the book shelf so that he can enjoy it. I see all of the flaws in it–he thinks it’s great! That’s family 🙂

Jeremy rearranged the paper lanterns to better our view of the little green guy and Morgan happily handed him tools and supervised in between rocking his baby doll and diapering it before putting her down for a nap. My heart swells when he makes connections like “baby has little pooh diaper–Morgan wears big boy underwear!” He tells his baby doll that she’s cute and he loves her. He wants all of his future siblings things to try out on his baby doll. Dolly has rocked in the bouncer, worn several newborn diapers, had her first binky, and wears mittens so that she doesn’t “Scratch her face”. Jeremy observed that our little guy is waaay more comfortable with these tasks than mommy. Funny but true!

We had lunch at a local chinese restaurant and Morgan insisted on taking every bite with his chopsticks. We discovered a new passion for Crab wontons and Chicken Lo Mein. It’s rare to see him get enthusiastic in a restaurant so I was happy that he dug in! When he was done, he sat in my lap with his blanket and told me how much he loves me. My heart feels like it’s swelling today for this sweet and polite little boy who is so kind. He appreciates every little thing right now and it is wonderful.  We use a lot of positive language in our home and it is shining through in the way that he speaks to us.

On the way home, he asked for a haircut–so J dropped me off at the house and the boys headed back to the barber shop. I could tell that Jeremy was quite apprehensive, he hasn’t handled this solo before. Morgan is a champ during hair cuts, so I know everything will be fine and he will be looking even MORE handsome for his Nanas when they arrive next week.  He’s learning that boys are handsome and girls are beautiful and it is so cute to hear him say “Mama, you Boo-tee-full”  He has me wrapped around his little finger!

I’m still anxious, but feeling more centered. I only have a few more of the dreaded Heparin shots to go and then we will meet our newest family member. Can’t wait!

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Senorita Psycho

The hormones have whipped into a frenzy–making me nervous, prone to cleaning, and  I haven’t slept in a few days…Thank you leg cramps that wake me up at 3am and often have me pacing the house…or might it be the awful heart burn and acid reflux that made me kneel before the porcelain gods last night and offer forth my dinner?

With so much going on inside of my body–the stuff on the outside seems overwhelming and exhausting. I am trying my best to keep up with a very busy boy this weekend and frustrated that I cannot carry him very much or sit on the floor to read stories. Belly is in the way of just about EVERYTHING. I also find that my attention span stinks and I drift off every few seconds with such earth shattering thoughts as–Did I pack socks for the hospital?? My swiss cheese memory does not provide the answer and it is back to the little blue suitcase for confirmation.

I keep feeling this wild fight or flight response in these last few days–the desire to move out of my body and into some place calm where I can lie down comfortably  or complete a sentence without  stumbling.  It’s like I’m inside a computer screen with my “to-do” list scrolling down the monitor…OVERLOAD.  Poor Jeremy–there is probably nothing more that he would enjoy than moving out for a week as well. He is completely baffled…as in “Who are you and what have the aliens done with my wife? Where is DINNER?”

Even worse…is the realization that I am aware of how odd this time is and seem powerless to stop the hormone filled mood swings and constant Kooky behavior.

I screamed at my new cell phone last night when it didn’t work properly. I endlessly polished the side door of my car after noticing water spots left over from this morning’s trip to the car wash (SOOOO not me) and I bemoan the fact that I cannot lift heavier furniture for a good vacuuming (even though the maid was here on Monday).  I can lose 30 minutes of time agonizing over whether or not the yard will die if I am not able to water it and think the dog resents me for having a baby. She just has that look!

Wow. Adoption nesting was much more pleasant. I am ready for this little one to vacate the premises and to be myself again.


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Iron Man, Labor?, and Chili Dogs

Today, Jeremy was home with me all day so we decided to go to the movies to catch Iron Man 2. I love our movie days–mid day is our date time when he is post call.

Turns out, I could not focus on the movie at all because of my stomach doing all of these crazy weird things. I was so intensely uncomfortable that I thought I might run out of the movie a few times. I started to wonder if I was going into labor…but then…what the heck does a contraction feel like?  The feeling was literally like my insides were twisting and the top of my stomach felt hard.

After the movie, I googled it (because that is how I find out most things about pregnancy) and found this “how to know if you are in labor” article. Turns out, mostly illiterate people respond to the comments in these posts (Sorry BabyC4nter!) So I learned that it feels like “I gotta make a boo boo real hard” or “feeling like I split into” Don’t say?!?!

J was all for driving to the hospital and hooking me up to a monitor–as if 2x per week were not enough! He had an offer to work an extra shift at the hospital and needed to answer them ASAP.  I wanted a chili dog….um yeah. At 37 weeks your mind can change with the sight of a Fuddrucker’s sign.  I calmly reminded him that women can have contractions for days/weeks before the actual event and that lunch was my number one priority.

The cramps continued through lunch and a so/so chili dog. Nothing is spicy enough these days–even with a huge scoop of pico de gallo!  We decided to go home and try the big glass of water and rest on my left side to see what happened before he committed to work or we made a trip to the hospital.  We rested, the cramps abated and I woke Jeremy to pick up Morgan at school and he asked accusingly “So are you in labor??”

Dude…like I literally waste your time on purpose! I’m starting to think that if you’ve never BEEN in labor, there is no way to recognize it until it happens. I can google all I want….the information all starts out with “It’s different for everyone”.

Now it’s late…and the funky cramping has set in again. I’m thinking Braxton Hicks since I have been incredibly contraction free since my second trimester….I will let you know if I feel “Split Into”.


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The pregnancy induced insomnia stinks….it really does. Worse than regular insomnia…I am exhausted as heck and there is just no way to get comfortable.  I toss and turn, manipulating about a dozen pillows this way and that…trying to take the pressure off of my back, my hips…you name it.

I swear that the carpal tunnel that I have developed in both wrists is probably the worst. I have to elevate my upper body frequently, and when I do it feels like the blood has completely exited my hands/arms.  So some nights I end up sitting bolt upright against the pillows with my arms down in order to sleep.

Or maybe it’s the restless leg syndrome that has me pacing the house at all hours of the night…the soap trick worked for a while but the effects seem to have waned. Either I am in dire need of potassium or the anxiety is getting to me!

My mind keeps going at a thousand miles per hour–what still needs to be done? Hospital bag is almost packed–shower shoes have been purchased…crib is still in Morgan’s room…bleh….Jeremy SWEARS he will do it this weekend.

How bad will delivery hurt? Then I remind myself that labor/delivery are just 1-2 days out of my life….every braver and bigger and stronger woman has survived it. I’m just a wuss!

Finally got out of bed and snarfed down some cheese, proscuitto, and peppers. Yum. Too bad this will add heartburn to the equation 😉


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Focus on the prize

Even though there are rough days, I am trying to stay positive and to focus on the end result of pregnancy–hoping for a healthy and happy baby.  We have arrived at 33 weeks!

It took a few days to cope with the blood sugar monitoring! The numbers are still wacky, going between high and normal and it doesn’t seem to have a pattern because some of my highest carbohydrate meals lead to normal blood sugars and when I try to be as careful as possible the readings are high 🙂  More Karma for the dietitian!

Staying active does help. I’ve been cleaning out the guest room and putting in baby’s things. The bedding for the queen bed arrived last week and although it’s not my favorite, I think it will look very nice when the room is put together. I chose a simple white matelaisse with scalloped edges and plan to accent with throw pillows in our nursery colors….one of which is the celery green that we used in Morgan’s room. J’s family wants to be surprised–so we’re still hush hush.

Because of my medical risks, my ob has decided to induce me at 39 weeks if all goes well. So we now have an “estimated date of arrival” for baby Elmo and we’ve been making plans for family to visit. It’s been whirlwind now that I know we only have 6 weeks left! My mom and Dad/Stepmom are arriving the day before the induction and I am so thrilled they will all be here with us! J is taking 2 weeks off of work and will be home with me to cuddle and care for our new addition. He’s so excited 🙂  In fact, he’s stopped grimacing (almost) each time that I arrive home loaded with shopping bags and is even looking at what I buy. J’s mom will come a week after baby arrives and hopefully his dad too.

Morgan has been chattering non-stop about “Nana is coming!” All three grandmothers are called Nana and I think that they sort of blend together in his mind at this age. He loves and recognizes them equally well when face to face, but gets confused when 3 Nanas call on the phone. Then he’s like–dude, I have already said hello!  He even calls my good friend Liana “LiNana” which I am sure doesn’t help!

One of my girlfriends took me to Gymboree yesterday and we had fun purchasing some receiving blankets and onesies. They have such adorable stuff! Lots of zoo themes which remind me of  bringing Morgan home. I miss seeing my tiny little guy in his pastel blues and greens and got a bit teary eyed–which is par for the course right now. I bought him a new outfit as well so he wouldn’t feel left out of the fun and he was excited to wear it to school and show his girlfriend Peyton! He cracks me up–he’s been prone to exclaiming “I love Peyton” out of the blue in the car and they usually hug as soon as they see each other. Toddler love…

Today, J is off and we have 2 hours worth of doctor’s appts scheduled. I am glad he’s coming with me for the growth scan and first non-stress test as ultrasounds still give me this panicky PTSD feeling.  I will never get over receiving a fatal diagnosis after an u/s during my first pregnancy and no matter how many times I convince myself that I am brave and things are ok I can feel my pulse race and fight the urge to lie there crying for the entire appointment.  It has gotten so much better over the months because Baby Elmo is monitored via ultrasound every 2-4 weeks and it’s all been positive…but sometimes I ding out and start hearing my doctor’s voice from San Antonio and have to mentally start singing the ABC’s and bring myself back to the here and the now.  I loved Melissa’s comment that this appt is a nice time to relax and listen to baby. It will be very reassuring to know that the hospital is watching Baby E closely and will be able to pick up any problems in the coming weeks.


What else is happening now? Morgan is virtually pee trained for the potty!!! He got a second reward for receiving his 20th sticker on the Elmo potty chart. We took him to Chuckie Cheese on Saturday afternoon for lunch and he was in heaven. Morgan is still so little that his biggest thrill was plugging token after token into a game without playing it. J was laughing hysterically at me because it was a “bee catcher” game where I was stuck playing bee keeper for like 8 games in a row.  I lack coordination and trying to catch these little bees that popped up and put them into a honey pot should have been child’s play for a grown up but I looked like a bad episode of I love lucy 🙂   J is like the video game wizard who wins all of the tokens when we play at arcades…but he was eating pizza and decided to enjoy the free entertainment. SUCKER!

We also went on our date for our 5th Anniversary, which is on Wednesday this week.  I got to wear my pink Isabella Oliver obi wrap top that I have been saving…I must say that I looked quite stylish. Still, when the camera adds 15 lbs and you’ve gained 20 it’s always a surprise to see how big you look in the picture! I had a similar moment when I passed a full length mirror at the mall yesterday. WHOA BELLY!

I sort of said blood sugars be damned at dinner and shared a delicious peach tart with homemade vanilla ice cream with J for desert. I mean…I cannot have wine…desert shouldn’t have to go away too!

J also surpised me with an incredibly beautiful pink saphire and platinum bracelet to match my mother’s ring from bringing Morgan home. He’s so romantic! I had never seen the design and had not even hinted at wanting anything so I was blown away. XOXO


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3 Hour Glucose Test

I finally made it to the hospital today to do the 3 hour glucose test and ended up throwing up the solution after about half an hour in the waiting room. The lab specialist sent me to my ob clinic and they sent me home. RATS. I am pretty sure that I will have to go in and repeat the procedure at some point, but unfortunately this is the only day before my next ob appt that J will be able to take Morgan to school. That means that I will likely not get to the lab before 9:30-10:00am  and will be starving before I even begin the test.

For the past 8 months, if I don’t eat within an hour of waking I throw up. Even then…there are days when I just roll out of bed and vomit…including twice in the past week. Morning sickness was never a transient thing for me and will likely continue until the kiddo is delivered. I just cannot see how I am going to get through 4 hours of fasting for this test (minimum) and keep the glucose down.

The 100g solution tasted much worse than the 50g solution that only reminded me of sugary fruit punch. This stuff was like drinking syrup and my system went haywire. I was having hot flashes and feeling gross from the moment I swallowed it.  Even after getting sick, driving home and having the recommended combo of whole grains and protein i still felt like poo.  I napped in the big red chair with Claire bear for an hour and then J and I decided to run some errands and hit a matinee.  I ate an early lunch and the icky feeling continued–so much that I almost asked to leave the movie.

My common sense tells me that I do not have GD–no excess weight gain, baby trending at 19th percentile, no symptoms that I can spot. No way in heck that they are going to let me skip that test!

***On another note–I am completely overwhelmed by choosing a car seat. Any thoughts on infant seats? Morgan was 10 mos when we brought him home and I never had to buy the traditional infant seat. Right now, I am liking the Britax Chaparone–but is it worth the $$??


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