Tag Archives: third trimester

Senorita Psycho

The hormones have whipped into a frenzy–making me nervous, prone to cleaning, and  I haven’t slept in a few days…Thank you leg cramps that wake me up at 3am and often have me pacing the house…or might it be the awful heart burn and acid reflux that made me kneel before the porcelain gods last night and offer forth my dinner?

With so much going on inside of my body–the stuff on the outside seems overwhelming and exhausting. I am trying my best to keep up with a very busy boy this weekend and frustrated that I cannot carry him very much or sit on the floor to read stories. Belly is in the way of just about EVERYTHING. I also find that my attention span stinks and I drift off every few seconds with such earth shattering thoughts as–Did I pack socks for the hospital?? My swiss cheese memory does not provide the answer and it is back to the little blue suitcase for confirmation.

I keep feeling this wild fight or flight response in these last few days–the desire to move out of my body and into some place calm where I can lie down comfortably  or complete a sentence without  stumbling.  It’s like I’m inside a computer screen with my “to-do” list scrolling down the monitor…OVERLOAD.  Poor Jeremy–there is probably nothing more that he would enjoy than moving out for a week as well. He is completely baffled…as in “Who are you and what have the aliens done with my wife? Where is DINNER?”

Even worse…is the realization that I am aware of how odd this time is and seem powerless to stop the hormone filled mood swings and constant Kooky behavior.

I screamed at my new cell phone last night when it didn’t work properly. I endlessly polished the side door of my car after noticing water spots left over from this morning’s trip to the car wash (SOOOO not me) and I bemoan the fact that I cannot lift heavier furniture for a good vacuuming (even though the maid was here on Monday).  I can lose 30 minutes of time agonizing over whether or not the yard will die if I am not able to water it and think the dog resents me for having a baby. She just has that look!

Wow. Adoption nesting was much more pleasant. I am ready for this little one to vacate the premises and to be myself again.

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Dragging Ass…for lack of a better term

We survived the weekend with the feverish little guy! Sunday came and he was fever free…but he was a big old bucket of WHINE for the better part of the day. I was having my own issues to contend with, too much baby not enough room in the body! So between the two of us, Jeremy was probably contemplating a volunteer assignment to Afghanistan as a means of escape.

Morgan refused dinner last night–rosemary/walnut crusted chicken tenders, mashed sweet potatoes, and asparagus. He then demanded snacks about every 5 minutes until bed time.  Some days the kid insists on living off of cheese and crackers and it makes me crazy. I put plastic wrap over his untouched dinner plate and plan to hand it over tonight. Waste not, Want not.

J and I have been avidly following Breaking Bad on AMC –its been really intense this year! And living on the border as we do–some of the plots are frighteningly realistic.

Bedtime came and belly baby decided to take up residence with feet underneath my internal organs pushing for all she was worth. I alternated between an urge to hurl and total breathlessness. Comfort is a foreign concept–as is sleep. I tossed and turned for hours, gasping like Shamu on a beach. Is it any wonder that Jeremy did not get any sleep?

5am dawned bright and early and J was getting ready for work when Morgan let out a siren screech over the monitor. He wanted milk–then wanted into our bed–then wanted into his own bed…all accompanied by this insanely annoying trumpeting whine that was COMPLETELY uncalled for at 5am.  We went back and forth with Mommy carrying Morgan and his 75 lbs of blankets and pillows while he screamed that THIS (whatever the hell this was at the moment) was NOT what he wanted. 

Okey dokey then.  I finally plopped him and his blankets and pillows back into his bed and told him to take some deep breaths (ni Hao Kai Lan style) and figure out what he wanted! Then, when he was ready to use his words like a big boy he could let me know.  I waddled out of the room, feeling just too tired, overwhelmed, and mother #@$#ing  pregnant at 5am to deal with another peep. I turned the baby monitor off and left my bedroom door open, a nice compromise I thought!

7:30 rolled around and Morgan and all of his blankies and pillows arrived at my door demanding “Mommy! Where are you??”. It was apparent that 2 hours of sleep had not improved his mood 🙂

Somehow we made it through breakfast and getting dressed. I had an early ob appt so I was rushing him a bit and he was very anxious after 5 days at home to return to school. Thank goodness he has two of the kindest teachers on the planet. Ms “M” scooped him up at first sight and gave him a tight hug and his little head rested on her shoulder as he relished being toted around the playground (to the envy of his buddies).  Morgan’s little bestie–Peyton was there to welcome him and I knew the day would be ok.

I made the half hour trip to the hospital–scored some expectant mother parking! And stopped off at the lab for some blood work.  My ob wanted me to have a parvo titer done to make sure that I had not been exposed to the virus while Morgan was sick.  Then, off to the fetal monitoring appt. Things are looking great! No stress to baby, no contractions for Mommy. In the ultrasound you could see that baby Elmo’s hair is growing and getting longer. Can’t wait to see this little monkey!!

J was able to make it for most of the appt–he looks worse for lack of sleep than I do. Here’s hoping that Morgan has a great day at school and our drama meter will be set back to zero this evening.

I’m thinking I will be the only one participating in Meatless Monday tonight. I have plans for a spinach quiche or omelet–the boys are getting leftovers!

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Insomnia

The pregnancy induced insomnia stinks….it really does. Worse than regular insomnia…I am exhausted as heck and there is just no way to get comfortable.  I toss and turn, manipulating about a dozen pillows this way and that…trying to take the pressure off of my back, my hips…you name it.

I swear that the carpal tunnel that I have developed in both wrists is probably the worst. I have to elevate my upper body frequently, and when I do it feels like the blood has completely exited my hands/arms.  So some nights I end up sitting bolt upright against the pillows with my arms down in order to sleep.

Or maybe it’s the restless leg syndrome that has me pacing the house at all hours of the night…the soap trick worked for a while but the effects seem to have waned. Either I am in dire need of potassium or the anxiety is getting to me!

My mind keeps going at a thousand miles per hour–what still needs to be done? Hospital bag is almost packed–shower shoes have been purchased…crib is still in Morgan’s room…bleh….Jeremy SWEARS he will do it this weekend.

How bad will delivery hurt? Then I remind myself that labor/delivery are just 1-2 days out of my life….every braver and bigger and stronger woman has survived it. I’m just a wuss!

Finally got out of bed and snarfed down some cheese, proscuitto, and peppers. Yum. Too bad this will add heartburn to the equation 😉

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It happened over the last few weeks…

I have officially begun to burst out of my earlier purchased maternity clothing.  What started as a creeping of fabric at the waist has become a full on buddha belly hanging out of my pajamas or my jeans and it ain’t pretty.  The tees and tanks that I wore on our trip to Turks and Caicos in December are too tight and too short to wear outside of the house now and tents are looking like an option….

I experienced a bit of sadness knowing that 2 out of 4 pairs of maternity jeans are now too tight for wear. Demi panels are crushed under the weight of growing baby elmo and only the stuff that boasts of “secret fit belly” and “no panel” will work.  I am still happily rocking my beloved Paige Premium maternity jeans–I just have to add a band for support above the no-panel waist.   Tunics are optimal at this point unless I want slices of  baby elmo belly to be visible to casual bystanders.

Ahhh ladies…we have entered 30 weeks. I have ten weeks left to carry this child and stubbornness argues that I don’t want to shop anymore…while pride demands that the bump be covered and self esteem be preserved.

Some things I am loving:

Lilac Maternity clothes which can be worn after pregnancy as well–thanks to shirring and clever wrap design.

Slip on shoes

Scarves, earrings…anything that fits predictably day to day

Maxi Dresses. Soon the weather will be warm enough to shed the cardigans and enjoy these comfy tents to their fullest!

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